I'm starting to think about it becoming to look a lot like Christmas

Today, I finally assembled the gingerbread houses that I baked last week and mixed the week before. It has taken quite a while to get to this stage. Now, I only need to get all the little goodies to put on the houses. sigh. It just never seems to be done.

The kids have been starting to bug me about getting the Christmas decorations up. I don't mind having decorations, but I must admit to being a bit of a scrooge when it comes to decorating, parties, etc. around Christmas. It seems like so much for something that is over in a flash. A couple of years, we didn't even put up a tree. But now that my daughter knows what is going on, we wont' get away with that anymore.

We also won't get away with not buying them anything. When they were toddlers, we would wrap up some of their old toys and give it to them again. They didn't know the difference and had just as much fun as if it was new.

The last 2 months have been surrounded by talk of Christmas. Where we will go, what we will do, but mainly what presents they want. My daughter took the Michael's flyer last week and checked off the things she thought she would like. Then my son chimed it and said everything without a checkmark is what he wants. I'm trying to prepare them for the let down of only one toy, pj's and a book from us. My daughter reminded me that we have a big family and they will get them gifts too.

oh well. I'm trying.

Memories, all alone in the moonlight

We finally put the tree up today. It's actually kind of nice to have it up. It's nothing special - just a 4 foot artificial tree with lights and some ornaments. But, it works for us. If the presents don't fit around it, then we have too many presents.

Actually, I am hoping our family will opt out of presents for next year. Maybe not the kids, but at least for the adults in the extended family. Nobody is lacking for what we need. Nobody needs to waste their money buying things nobody wants. Maybe drawing names or even having a generic gift pile and make a game out of it - you know - the first person opens a gift, the 2nd person can steal that gift or unwrap a new one. The 3rd can then steal or choose a new one. I think that could be fun.

ummm. what else. I know there was something else. If only my brain would engage.

The baby is not very happy being put down for a nap. We tried earlier and failed. This time, I hope to win. They are very crafty at getting their own way.

oh yeah. One of the reasons we put up the tree today (other than it's less than a week away) is what my mother said to me on the phone. We were chatting about how I wasn't ready for Christmas and how she is glad she doesn't have the pressure of having Christmas brunch at her place this year. She also has no decorations up. So she said, "Kristen, you're making memories for your kids!! You need to do what you need to do!"

That kind of thing holds no power over me (well, okay maybe a very, itsy-bitsy bit!) It just sounds full of guilt and shame and pressure to make things a certain way when there is no need for anything that certain. Having a stressed out mother also makes memories and not the kind that go along with a nice holiday.

I've just been thinking about what I remember about our Christmases. The only things I remember revolve around presents and food. We opened our presents Christmas morning and then ate the rest of the day. Even as a child, I was fat and food obsessed. Christmas was perfect for getting lots of sugar all day long.

Hear that? That's the sound of a sleeping baby!

So, what are the memories we are going to create for our kids? As a child, I always wanted to open one gift on Christmas eve. I think I would like to do that. Anada just asked if we could. I wonder about the same gift each year - the traditional new set of pj's for Christmas or something like that. "When I was growing up, my parents always got me a ________ for Christmas. You know, I think I've received one of those every year since I was a kid! It always reminds me of Christmas." Hmmmm. Something to ponder.

As I get smaller, hopefully we will also be more active and have something physical be a yearly tradition too. Maybe my feet will actually get small enough to fit into ice skates!?!?!?

As I get older and I learn to trust God more and love Him more, it's also important to set up the faith traditions. My mom started reading the Christmas story when we were teenagers before we would open the presents. It's a start. It's hard to have any meaningful conversation because my family doesn't share our feelings with each other. Especially me. I would really like to begin open discussions with my husband and kids while they are young. I think it will make it less awkward.

Hear that? She's not sleeping anymore.